Morning Wood: You have been Dismissed.

Posted: November 26th, 2008 By: meat hat | Under: Uncategorized, dismissed | Tags: , , , , ,

Meat Hat:

Morning Wood affects all men who don’t have to pop [Viagra] like its hot.

Sure, boners are cool, but they are not cool when peeing, at work, in class, driving, or waking up with strangers in alley ways.

Nocturnal penile tumescence is the science word for this nuisance.  Basically, blood has to flow to the mans purpose  to keep it from falling off.

Dudes can get boners whenever they feel like it, they however can’t help morning wood, and the worst part is, it doesn’t always happen right when you wake up. In college I remember having to TUCK it up into my belt while walking to class. Sometimes at work I’ll get them, but at least I have a desk to shield myself.

But for me, I hate morning wood boner sex [i may be alone on this]. Sex is like pizza, even a bad piece of sex is some pretty good sex. But, morning wood sex is like ordering someone else wiener out on lone to fuck. Sure its hard, but it doesn’t feel the same. Its like cheating your brain or something. So, I wish I could just get on with  my day and not have to worry when I’m going to stand at attention.

While I appreciate Boners, I dismiss Morning Wood.

Bonus: People in the UK call it Morning Glory. Which to me makes that Oasis song a lot cooler.

For your enjoyment, Turbo Negro’s – I got an erection.  Music video by YOUTH.

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3 Comments on “Morning Wood: You have been Dismissed.”

  1. #1 MakeYourBananaCry said at 3:50 pm on November 26th, 2008:

    I actually love the morningwood. It’s a great way to start the day. It’s like you wake up and your body already knows what your thinking. I wake up and I’m like ‘Hell yeah it’s going to be a good day!” Ha ha ha.

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  2. #2 MakeYourBananaCry said at 3:57 pm on November 26th, 2008:

    Oh morningwood’s do suck when I have to pee. So I just think about a hairy mole a guy i knew once had on his chest and then i lose the morningwood quickly. So I half agree on the dismissed of the morningwood.

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  3. #3 JerkStore said at 2:26 pm on December 16th, 2008:

    This is called an N.R.B. – No Reason Boner. It happens when your board or when your doing math homework.

    http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=nrb

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