Vapid Dipshits: You Have Been Dismissed
Posted: December 5th, 2008 By: Slut Cake | Under: Bad Girls, dismissed, people | Tags: bros, douchebags, society's horrific decline, spencer pratt
Express had this shirt on sale, bro!
You may know them as “Bros”, “Greasy Pervs” or “Douchebags”, but one thing is universal – they are a scourge on humanity. I know what you’re thinking – “Why would you dismiss someone who has a moniker which already implies dismissal?” Good question, but that’s precisely why they need dismissing.
Check out my nips, baby
Most of us on this here slice of the internet probably limit our interactions with such wastes of carbon to sightings on the street or disdainful glances in their direction at bars. But the problem is that while those of us not wearing polo shirts and sweet sweet button up shirts from the Armani Exchange dismiss them outright, society as a whole props them up as “cool dudes with attitude”. Don’t believe me? How much publicity, money and “fame” does this guy get for being a huge dickwad from Orange County with a cunty girlfriend?
If there were any justice, Spencer Pratt would fall on a nail before burning in a fire
My point is this, while we may be quiet with our dismissals, all this leads to is for slime balls like this to hear our insults which go over his head and say “yeah well … you’re just like, jealous bro. Plus you look kinda Mexican so I’m pretty sure you shouldn’t even be here” (Please understand that the preceding fictitious quote is from Spencer Pratt, I am in no way implying that there are no Mexican douchebags. I hate equally across all shithead borders). And before you know it, your younger brother is all up in the club looking like this:
TIMMY NO!
Or even worse…
The children of mobsters have never been so sexy as this trio
There is only one cool dude with attitude that I will accept in my world and his name is Poochie
Dismissals are like votes but instead of for meaningless things like government positions, dismissals provide a way to announce to the world that a segment of society should be ostracized and for good reason (Unless someone dismisses another Pixar movie, those dismissals do not count).
So say it with me, say it loud, and say it to the next god damn fuckwad who might leave a voicemail like this on your phone – Vapid dipshits, you are dismissed.
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| 3 Comments »
I work in an area that my air is shared with these vapid types. I’m glad its not contagious.
Dismissal appropriate… sure. But, I have always felt a little bit better about myself when I see these individuals or interact with them. Elitist, me? Probably.
But, their appearance alone always gives me a chuckle. It is sad, but they entertain me.
Oh yes, it’s all fun and games making fun of them and feeling better about yourself… until they outbreed you and their horrifying children inherit the planet.
Pretty soon you go to see Dr. Lexus so he can tell you that “basically your shit’s all fucked up” and the only show on TV is “Ow! My Balls!”