Flat-Billed Hats: You have been dismissed.

I love hats.  They’re great for a ton of useful things like hiding a fucked up hair cut from Super Cuts.  What I hate, are flat-billed hats and the people that wear them.  Who are you? Fucking Charlie Brown?

Add to that the shiny New Era sticker (I have some shiny keys for you to jangle, too), it looks like you just bought it to show it off and plan on returning it later.  Who fucking cares if the hat is authentic New Era, you’re talking the difference or twenty dollars or whatever.  It’s not like you’re representing a 500 designer purse as opposed to a twenty dollar knock-off from China town (which is pretty lame, too).  Now, they’ve got stickers that cover the entire fucking bill of the hat.

Coming soon, Boston Sports Dismissal

So, fuck you and the people who wear you, Flat-billed hat.  You are another addition to the douche-bag uniform and a visual reminder that I don’t want to know the people that wear you.

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